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  • State to State

    The governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the governor’s dog, then bites the governor.

    The governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie “Bambi” and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

    He calls animal control. animal control captures the coyote and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it.

    He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases.

    The governor goes to the hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged.

    The running trail gets shut down for six months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals.

    The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a “coyote awareness program” for residents of the area.

    The State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.

    The governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The State spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training re: the nature of coyotes.

    PETA protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $5 million suit against the State.

    In Texas

    The governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out.

    The governor shoots the coyote.

    The governor has spent 50 cents on a .380 hollow point cartridge.

    The Buzzards eat the dead coyote.

    And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.
    "Hey Hillary, regarding the Benghazi Attack on 9/11-we'll just blame it on that movie, not my total lack of security. By the way, what's so significant about 9/11 anyway-was that a date my buddy Bill Ayers of the Weather Underground blew up a government building?" asked Obama to Hillary. BEAUTIFY AMERICA, RUN OVER A LIBERAL, THEN BACK UP AND SEE IF HE'S DEAD.
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