Need some help with a situation...

[Gray Ducker]

...ok, so at the end of the season last year I had a big falling out with a very close friend, we haven't spoke since - until an e-mail yesterday.
Now first, we've been friends for years, he was there for me during my second divorce and some other dark times. I was always there for him and his family, was even the only friend that came to see him, his wife and new baby boy at the hosbital. Point is we were there for each other no mater what for years, then he started getting more and more distant. Hard to get ahold of, didn't return calls what-so-ever, just kind of faded away. He slowly turned into a "friend" that only called when HE needed something.
I always called him (and left a message) with an invite to hunt or fish ANY time I was going. Also called and gave hunting reports, scouting reports and any other helpfull info. I feel many times when I wasn't able to hunt, but scouted and gave them the info on where I would go, they did and got on the ducks.
We were on the same lease last year along with some other so called friends. Well things continued to go downhill during the season. I was able to hunt a lot more than the rest of them and as an end result and root cause was not asked to return to the lease. In addition other names and mudslinging along with a "you are now banned from any activities, (hunting, fishing, etc.) with Mr.A and Mr.B"
This happened over text and email NOT a SINGLE call or in person meeting. Him and the others flat out refused. I was not in the wrong for anything over than getting to hunt more often than them. There were no rules or guidelines on the lease contract pertaining to how many times to hunt, how often etc. After many emails and texts only and some more BS and namecalling, I finally had enough and requested they loose my numbers, contact info and not to contact me again.
I felt completely betrayed and stabbed in the back, hell I still do. With friends like that, who needs enemies?!! Just completely blindsided me, no idea or warning. I had never been betrayed like that before in my life. All the trust I had was gone.
So, I started my own lease and members for this season, and just moved on.
Fast forward to yesterday, got an email from him stating how sorry he was/is for all that was said & done seven months ago, now asking for forgiveness.
Now I'm not above forgiveness, you know the saying "forgive but don't forget."
However a few things are bothing me here. Why contact me now? It's only a week before season kicks off, is he just trying to get back to buddy-buddy for the season? What is his motive? Does he have a hidden motive or is this a real apology? I just don't know.
The trust I had there will never be the same, I still feel like I have a knife sticking out my back.
I am thinking long and hard on how to respond.
On one hand we used to be the best of friends, on the other when this happened I found out who my true-real friends were.

Thanks guys.

[PasadenaMan]

You hit the nail on the head.

Its kind of like a man cheats on his wife with another married woman
The mistriss says she is going to going to divorce her current husband to marry the cheating man.

So the Cheating man tries to mess things up with his wife to try to get her
to divorce him.

The Cheating mans mistriss decides not to leave her husband and work things out.

Durring the affair the cheating man wanted to get his wife to ask for a divorce and acted bad or disrespectful.

Now that the mistress wants to leave the Cheating Man and stay with her Husband.
The Man that was cheating has to make things better with his wife and try not to make her ask for a divorce.

[dbarham]

youfind out who your friends are!! what a chickenchit!

[lurefisher]

Accept the apology and play it by ear is what I would do, after all he was a friend.

[dbarham]

Accept the apology and play it by ear is what I would do, after all he was a friend.

you liar you would have gave em the red X

[lurefisher]

you liar you would have gave em the red X

Naw it seems this guy might need the Ducker for something then when he ask Ducker can really tell him how he feels.

[sushidog6]

Have you considered asking him to meet and talk about what and why the situation occured in the first place. I know that right now you are probably feeling uncertain as to weather you should be friends again, but unless you can discuss what happened you will also feel betrayed.
Always be the best that you can be.

[Muddskipper]

Just reply thanks for the email, and it weighed hard on you all last year how things went down.

And leave it at that .... don't invite or anything else .... Take the high road and move on like you already have.

Who knows down the road you might cross paths again and with a little mor time it might work out.

[Ibtsoom]

I'd just be honest and tell him what you think and how you feel. Tell him your side of the story and forgive him if you think thats the best thing -- but you have to make it known that things arent the same and they wont ever be.

[sublimesurf74]

Agree with everyone reply how hurt you were and still are that you are glad he apologized and leave it at that for now. I def would not offer any meet up yet. Let him reply. And don't offer any hunting this season even if kisses your ***. Of course play by ear by your feelings

[Swells]

Man it's simply called growing up, and I've had to move on from a bunch of very old and dear friends over the years. Best to simply go your own way. It's never fun and it never seems to help to talk about it, since they'll try to guilt trip ya and then get ya in trouble again! I don't play little mind games no more. The only real friend I have is my wife of 25 years, anyways, and I can always find dudes to go fishing, sailing, hunting, or jumping out of perfectly good airplanes. It is fun meeting new people, anyways.

[45 ACP]

I dunno man. I've always been one of those dudes that will go out of my way to be a great friend to people who treat me with the same respect. But, if anyone ever screws me over, thats it!! I never forget. Sometimes Ive been like fark you and never speak to the person again. Other times I may accept an appology and be civil to them, but never as good buddies as we once were.

Sounds like youve got your season all planned out and ready to hunt. Id forget about the dude for a while and not return emails or calls just as he did to you. Hes probably needing another place to hunt this year and that may be the only reason hes contacting you.

[Oleander Kayaker]

Sounds like youve got your season all planned out and ready to hunt. Id forget about the dude for a while and not return emails or calls just as he did to you. Hes probably needing another place to hunt this year and that may be the only reason hes contacting you.

I agree, it's not coincedental that the call happens just before the seasons starts. Maybe next season. But, make it overly clear (in writing?) what the lease terms/conditions/procedures are, for everyone. It'll save friendships and create new ones down the road.

[lurefisher]

I dunno man. I've always been one of those dudes that will go out of my way to be a great friend to people who treat me with the same respect. But, if anyone ever screws me over, thats it!! I never forget. Sometimes Ive been like fark you and never speak to the person again. Other times I may accept an appology and be civil to them, but never as good buddies as we once were.

Sounds like youve got your season all planned out and ready to hunt. Id forget about the dude for a while and not return emails or calls just as he did to you. Hes probably needing another place to hunt this year and that may be the only reason hes contacting you.

Yepp Im the same way once im done im done!

[Gray Ducker]

Time will tell, I have agreed to meet him tomorrow over a drink. Hopefully we can bury the hatchet. I will for dam sure keep a close eye on my six.